The "Must Post" Thread

[piersdad]

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven, I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."

[Otto Puzzell]

 

[Ultra]

Stopping by.

[Otto Puzzell]

Hi!

Bye!

[porridgehead]

Are you gonna eat that blubber?

[piersdad]

A newly discovered asteroid designated 2009 VA, which is only about 7 meters in size, passed about 2 Earth radii (14,000 km) from the Earth's surface Nov. 6 at around 16:30 EST. This is the third-closest known (non-impacting) Earth approach on record for a cataloged asteroid.

The two closer approaches include the 1-meter sized asteroid 2008 TS26, which passed within 6,150 km of the Earth's surface on October 9, 2008, and the 7-meter sized asteroid 2004 FU162 that passed within 6,535 km on March 31, 2004.

On average, objects the size of 2009 VA pass this close about twice per year and impact Earth about once every 5 years.

missed again

[Otto Puzzell]

Zoom!

[Allemano]

What happened to the front page?

[piersdad]

asteroid hit it

[Otto Puzzell]

All is well again (thanks, Ultra!)

[piersdad]

A man who isn't qualified keeps pestering this tailor about giving him a job selling suits. Finally, the owner tells him if he can sell this one green suit he will give him a job.
Another employee points out to owner that they have had that suit on the rack for four years, and that it is such an ugly, green suit that nobody would ever buy it.
The owner replies, "Yah, I know. That's my way of getting rid of that pest!"
Two hours later the new guy calls his boss for his next assignment. The owner cannot believe it and heads down to the store to see how this fellow did it. Upon arrival he sees his new salesman bleeding, scratched, and his clothes torn in several places, but smiling.
"Congratulations, the job is yours! Nobody has come close to selling that old, ugly, green suit. But tell me, what in the world happened to you?"
"Well, replied the salesman, the guy that bought the suit loved it...said it fit him great. As far as my injuries go, he had this really sensitive seeing-eye dog!"

[Otto Puzzell]

Never forget.....

[piersdad]

 
   
The water powered motor mower

Colin had an old mower and after many years of faithful service the carburetor finally decided it was kaput.
The lawn refused to stop growing so with some lateral thinking Colin fed a hose from the air intake to the outlet of the petrol tank and with another pipe fed down to the bottom of the tank it enabled the air to bubble through the petrol before entering the motor.
Well the motor mower worked fine as long as the tank was full and so just adding a bit of water to the tank allowed the bubble up system to work.
So this day a friend stopped to chat and while Colin was mowing the lawn. However the motor mower spluttered to a stop and so Colin commented to his friend that it had run out of water and at that Colin turned the hose on and part filled the tank.
To add to the friend's amazement he added a few hand full of grass.(this stopped the water from getting into the air outlet)
This enabled the remaining petrol to vaporize well and run the motor again,
So a totally amazed friend now goes around telling people that he has a friend that runs his mower on water and grass clippings.

[Allemano]

As Yahoo's GeoCities was recently shut down many sources aren't available anymore 

[Ultra]

All is well again (thanks, Ultra!)

It was good to do and have done. 

[Otto Puzzell]

Hey - why is there no DC5 music available on CD's or MP3's?

[piersdad]

30 c heat here  looks like global warming is getting its grips on.
[tr]it says above insert table row[/tr]
[td]now table column[/td]
^{super script}
_{sub script having fun here}
teletype here

• list
• list

any way have a good day every one

[Otto Puzzell]

Say what?

[Ultra]

http://www.mininova.org/com/691629

[piersdad]

I need a bulb for the horn on my car and as it is vintage car there is none made for the last 20 years
In fact bulb horns went out in the 1926 and the old one was totally perished.
I asked around friends if they knew of a supply of this very rare object.
It was just a large rubber bulb that fitted on the end of the vintage cars air horn and when you squeezed it went KKLLAAARRRK ? like a goose in great pain.

Well it was several weeks till a lady told me that a chemist shop might help but did not elaborate on what it might be off.
I asked around other friends and soon found out the article I wanted it was called? A boogie and its use was used for a medical purpose but they did not elaborate on what it was used for.

So green as grass and only 18 years old I bowled into the chemists shop and asked the attractive young lady attendant? for a boogie.? She seemed embarrassed and said
  "I had better ask the? chemist"
and called the boss over.
I again asked for a boogie and the chemist asked me what I wanted it for.
I in my innocence said I wanted it for my horn.
The chemist grinned widely and said
"Do you know what a boogie is used for"
"No sir"
"It used for relieving constipated people of their hardened poohs"
At this I was getting rather embarrassed and asked if I could see one.
When he produced the article it appeared to have all sorts of bits that fitted to the end of a large rubber bulb.
It was used to inject soapy water in unmentionable placed to relieve constipation.
"You say you wanted it for your horn"
"Yes sir its for my car "
"Ahh your car horn" he replied with some relief.
The rubber bulb was just what I wanted and after it was wrapped up I exited the chemist shop not daring to look the lovely young lady assistant in the eye.

After that I threw the accessories away and attached the bulb to the cars horn.
Well from then on every time I blew this horn it reminded me of a loud FAARRT? rather than a goose in great pain.

[knightfan26917]

Cold weather is just around the corner........ugh.



Cort | 36swm.IL | "Mr Monte Carlo"."Mr Road Trip" | pig valve.pacemaker ...drive south, Nov 09
WRMNshowcase.legos.HO.models.MCs.RTs.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"Is it stormy where you are?"  ... Billie Myers ... 'Kiss The Rain'

[piersdad]

thanks for sending the summer down here to new zealand

[knightfan26917]

Bah humbug.

Will you please send it ... back?



Cort | 36swm.IL | "Mr Monte Carlo"."Mr Road Trip" | pig valve.pacemaker ...radio show, Dec 09
WRMNshowcase.legos.HO.models.MCs.RTs.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"Spare me your freaking dirty looks" ... Katy Perry ... 'Waking Up In Vegas'

[piersdad]

has to be the slow post sorry cant do any better

[Otto Puzzell]

http://www.mininova.org/com/691629

Interesting