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Non-Automotive Topics => Humor => Topic started by: Carnut on October 09, 2014, 10:54:12 AM

Title: Do you speak Woman?
Post by: Carnut on October 09, 2014, 10:54:12 AM
Words women use:

1) FINE

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) FIVE MINUTES

If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour.  Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) NOTHING

This is the calm before the storm.  This means something, and you should be on your toes.  Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end in "fine".

4) GO AHEAD

This is a dare, not permission.  Don't, under any circumstances, do it!

5) LOUD SIGH

This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men.
A loud sign means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here arguing with you about nothing (refer back to #3 for the meaning of 'nothing').

6) THAT'S OK

This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man.  "That's OK" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) THANKS

A woman is thanking you.  Do not question or faint.  Just say "You're welcome."

8) WHATEVER

This is a woman's way of saying "F@%K YOU"!

9) DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, I GOT IT

Another dangerous statement which means this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times but is now doing it herself.  This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?"; for the woman's response see #3.


Title: Re: Do you speak Woman?
Post by: Otto Puzzell on October 09, 2014, 12:00:11 PM
All true