Love the Scots!

[Carnut]

Bono, lead singer of the rock band U2, is famous throughout the entertainment industry for being more than a little self-righteous.

At a recent U2 concert in Glasgow, Scotland, he asked the audience for total quiet.

Then, in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands once every few seconds.  Holding the audience in total silence, he said into the microphone "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."

From the front of the crowd a voice with a broad Glaswegian accent pierced the quiet:

"Well f**ckin' stop doin' it then, ya evil bastard!"

[Djetset]

Ha Ha Ha, I'd not heard this one before.  I'll use it tonight in the pub 

[Carnut]

Ha Ha Ha, I'd not heard this one before.  I'll use it tonight in the pub 

As I have a couple of times; goes down very well!